My anticipation level for new movies during the holidays is a lot like my excitement for Christmas presents. Just like tiptoeing down the stairs on Christmas morning to peer under the tree, I still have child-like excitement to discover the year’s biggest films from studios who push out their best hopes for Oscar season. But my expectations for a decent, new holiday-themed film align more with my chances of getting a well-thought gift from a distant relative - lower than a telemark skier’s knee.
Eager to try out the comfy recliners and revamped screens at the Redstone Megaplex, which I’m happy to report are excellent, I had high hopes for the new holiday film from Amazon’s MGM studios, “Red One.” Teased with a trailer that showed the promise of a fun plot and strong cast led by Dwayne Johnson, Chris Evans and J.K. Simmons, I grabbed a tasty bucket of improved popcorn and took a heated seat for a ride to the North Pole.
“Red One” is directed by Jake Kasdan, who worked with Johnson on the rebooted “Jumanji” films, where he delivered solid action and comedic hits with surprisingly broad cross-over appeal. Unfortunately, he fails to recapture the holiday spirit with “Red One.”
The film’s plot begins with the kidnapping of Santa from a teched-out North Pole, where Dwayne Johnson plays Callum Drift, the head of Santa’s secret security detail. Santa’s secret location was compromised by a Santa-denier and bounty hunter Jack O’Malley, played by Chris Evans. O’Malley is level 4, a life-long member of the naughty list, but agrees to switch teams and save Santa for a big payday. As expected, Jack and Callum team up to find Santa and save Christmas.
Captain America’s Chris Evans trying to portray O’Malley as a dead-beat dad is about as unconvincing as Tom Cruise at the beginning of “War of the Worlds.” Cruise’s performance was anchored and saved by the outstanding performances of Dakota Fanning and Justin Chatwin as his children. Evans is not as fortunate here, as his son’s character isn’t given the screentime nor backstory to convince us how bad O’Malley really is. Instead, the story shifts to incorporate European folklore, including St. Nick’s evil brother Krampus and his ex-girlfriend, a Christmas witch. Again, the plot leaps without much backstory or incorporation of their folklore which could have been interesting. Instead, we are force-fed the Rock’s usual antics, which deliver a hefty side message of the predictable Dickensian “it’s never too late to change your ways.”
So, on my ski trail rating system, “Red One” earns my lowest GREEN ski trail rating. There’s just enough of The Rock and his silly buddy good cop, bad cop banter with Chris Evans to keep pre-teens mildly entertained and deliver life lessons on redemption. However, the script lacks any memorable dialogue and the director’s pacing and story-telling lag like a bad office holiday party. This movie will pass for a matinee if you want to avoid holiday shopping for a few hours, but it won’t earn a spot on your annual must-see holiday movie list.
“Red One” is playing locally at LHM’s revamped Megaplex theater with a runtime more bloated than Santa’s belly of two hours and twenty-three minutes. “Red One” is rated PG-13 for action, language, violence, and the Krampus slap game.
